Building trust

I want to change it all.

I'm supposed to be on holiday, but I'm restless.

My thoughts are a bit chaotic, the list of things I want to do keep piling up in my brain, my diary, my notebook, my Notion To-Do Master List...

I want to change it all, become this idealised version of myself that sometimes I catch glimpses of.

I want to change it all, and the truth is that I am not even able to stick to the simple rule of stop looking at any screen past 2130h 😒

There are a few reasons why, at this very moment, I am struggling to keep with a clear path of action, but that is the topic for another post, and I am digressing. What I wanted to talk about is "building trust".

I heard something the other day that struck me: "If you and I agreed to go to the gym everyday at 1000h, and I wouldn't show up any day, next month when I ask you to go to the gym with me, would you trust me?"

The answer is clear, no, you wouldn't.

The same happens with the trust in yourself. If I agree with myself to stop looking at any screens past 2130h, and when the time comes I spend 2 more hours scrolling on IG, when I agree with myself that I am going to do a 10-minute stretch everyday, does my brain trust me?

The answer is clear, no, she wouldn't (my brain).

Building trust is an everyday task, towards others, but most importantly, towards ourselves. If you keep neglecting the agreements you make with yourself, you learn not trust yourself, and eventually, that leads to lose you self-respect.

I believe I have lost some of the trust I had in myself, which is leading to not having a clear path of action.

The good news is that that trust can be recovered, and after awareness comes action. You don't have to change it all at once; you just need to take the first step.

My first step in rebuilding my self-trust will look like a monthly goal.

"I will stop looking at any screen past 2130h."

I'll report back.

Love,

Aitana